First off, I would like to say how humbled I am to be named the first Czar of Amateur and Professional Sports. I can honestly say that I am the best of the best people that President Trump has hired thus far in his administration. With that being said, let's get to work solving this grand FBS only puzzle.
Rule 1: No more numbers in conference names. You lost this right when you didn't update the Bigs. Also it's super lazy.
Rule 2: The Big 12 shall henceforth be renamed the Southwest Conference. Why? 1) Nostalgia, and 2) see Rule #1.
Rule 3: Any and all conference alignment goes through me. You wanna move up? Goes through me. You wanna move down? Goes through me. Notice a pattern?
Rule 4: All money is evenly distributed among all schools, regardless of conference affiliation. The Championship game features 2 SEC schools? Everyone shares the revenues. Don't like it, I'll throw you in jail because I'm the czar.
Rule 5: My legal team says that I don't have the power to throw you in jail. Fine. But you're on my sh!t list.
Rule 6: Regular season is 11 games and you must finish with a winning record to make a bowl game. No more of this 6-7 with a loss in a Bowl BS.
Rule 7: 16 team playoff. Every conference gets an auto bid; at large from anywhere.
Rule 8: No putting sports above human welfare. This shall be explained, and denoted with an asterisk (*). Punishments based on recency, and takes into account punishments already levied by former NCAA administration.
Southwest Conference - Texas, Texas Tech, Texas A&M, TCU, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Kansas, Kansas State, Iowa State, Nebraska, Houston, Baylor*.
- This brings Nebraska and Texas A&M where they belong, in my opinion, which is the only one that matters.
* Baylor loses its share of revenue sharing for two ( years due to the sexual assault scandal and cover-up by members of the Athletic Department and University.)
SEC - Georgia, South Carolina, Kentucky, Missouri, Florida, Vanderbilt, Tennessee, Auburn, Alabama, LSU, Mississippi State, Ole Miss, Arkansas, West Virginia.
- Pretty straightforward; WVU replaces TAMU
Pacific Coast Conference - No changes; Stanford, Washington, Wash St, Oregon, Cal, Oregon St, USC, Arizona, Arizona St, UCLA, Utah, Colorado.
- Name change to satisfy rule 1. Name will be bought from current rights holders.
ACC - Clemson, Florida St, Loo-ville, NC St, Wake Forest, Duke, Georgia Tech, Miami, UNC, Maryland, UVA, VT
- People keep forgetting Maryland is in the (former) Big Ten. It tripped me up just last week. Maryland, you had your fun... it's time to go home.
Great Lakes Conference - Michigan, Michigan St*, Ohio State, Wisconsin, Penn St, Pitt, Iowa, Illinois, Northwestern, Minnesota, Indiana, Purdue
- Pitt joins the GLC in a trade for Maryland to the ACC; Nebraska and Rutgers go home.
* Michigan St loses its share of revenue sharing for three (3) years due to the sexual assault scandal and cover-up by members of the Athletic Department and University.
* Penn St does not lose revenue sharing due to harshness of penalties from NCAA. But so help me, if you think about putting that JoePa statue back up...
New England Conference - Boston College, Syracuse, Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rutgers, Army, UNH, Maine, Buffalo.
- That's right... a 9 team conference. Mostly because I didn't know whether Stony Brook or Albany should be #10. I'll let them prove themselves in FCS because I'm a genius. An evil genius. Mwahaha!
- Also, you might ask why ex-P5 teams are grouped with G5s and FCS call ups. 1) Because geography, 2) because they should have performed better in their old P5 conferences, and 3) because I said so.
Mountain West - Boise St, Wyoming, Colo St, Air Force, Utah St, New Mexico, Fresno St, San Diego St, UNLV, Nevada, Hawaii, New Mexico St.
- NMSU in, SJSU out.
Sun Belt - Troy, App St, Arkansas ST, Georgia St, UL-Monroe, UL-Lafayette, South Alabama, Coastal Carolina, Georgia Southern, Texas St
- Stays at 10 after NMSU goes to MWC, Idaho to FCS.
MAC - Akron, Bowling Green, C Michigan, W Michigan, Miami(OH), N Illinois, Ohio, Toledo, Temple, Navy.
- Navy and Temple join; Buffalo to New England; EMU, Ball St, Kent St drop to FCS.
- MAC stays at 10, with room to add if needed... I mean, if I decide to let them.
- No more M, Tu, or W games! Thu-Sat only!
CUSA and AAC trade East for West. To avoid confusion, they will both be renamed.
Creole Conference - N Texas, UAB, Southern Miss, La Tech, UTSA, Rice, UTEP, SMU, Tulane, Tulsa, Memphis.
Eastern Atlantic Conference - UCF, USF, ECU, Cincinnati, FAU, FIU, Marshall, W Kentucky, Mid Tenn St, ODU, Charlotte, JMU
ND and Liberty stay independent. Liberty already has their schedule filled so I did not want to inconvenience them.
BONUS ENTRY! A corporate sponsor has come forward to sponsor a new conference, and I will allow it, as it saves San Jose St and Idaho from relegation. Ladies and gentlemen... I present...
Quilted Northern Conference - San Jose St, BYU, NDSU, SDSU, Montana, Weber St, Idaho, North Dakota, South Dakota.
- Thanks, Quilted Northern and Georgia-Pacific!
LONG LIVE THE CZAR!!!
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Summertime Exercise with + REP for the prize.
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